woot.. thanks babe for helping me get a new host for my song hee so my blog finally got music again hehess.. babe u shd do the same for ur blog too! keke.. *F2*

well well.. camp is still screw up.. me and another guy got chosen to do admin work! so we been facing openoffice for 2days doing up a new system for him to monitor our vehicles UQM and AVI due dates.. faints.. its really not easy monitoring 100 over vehicles maintenances and servicing..

see until mad.. sighs.. well today we had 10 new drivers posted to us! and 1 new storeman.. so total 11 new guys.. most of them poped from eagles coy.. so well yea quite scary.. well good thing that we got alot of new t-list now.. first time i ever see so many of them being posted in.. and yea the new MTO has also been posted in to replace the last MTO whom had ORDed.. so far he seem quite alright.. i haven interact with him much yet so not sure abt his real personalities...

well aniway its good.. since many of the current drivers will be ord-ing soon.. we are really in need of more drivers to replace them.. else theres really going to be a huge shortage of drivers..

mehhs.. xmas is so near.. about 30mins more and it'll be xmas eve.. cant believe yea.. next year this time i can start to count down to my ORD le!! hehehe.. hopes everything will go smooth and easy for the upcomming new 2009.. but provided that our dear MSG dont make life difficult for us..

thats all for now! :)

P.s: my foot rot until now haven recover!! ahhh so itchy but i cant scratch cos its fleshy! yucks!

- i hate cold blooded girls *
11:12 PM

sigh.. keep having nightmare.. cant find peace in everything.. looks like wat happened in camp the past weeks still leave a deep impact on me.. I'm really getting phobia.. sighs.. wat can i do?..
i know what everyone thinks.. "nothing!" that's right.. *smiles*..

just live with it.. life's goes on like how everyone simply said.. sometimes i wonder how is everything is free and easy for them is it because they're not expecting much or putting in much or is it something else i couldn't understand.. and its not that i keep making myself so uptight it.. things just happens and feelings just reacted the way its made for..

all i can presume is everyone has their own issues.. and maybe they just dun wan to show it as much as i does that's all.. and its not that i like to show it.. but even hiding it wont help.. even if i can cheat my mouth.. my face and mood cant lie..

nahs.. anyway found a nice song! i love it..

thanks to kms video for letting me found this awesome track! *F2*



Epik High - One
(so meaningful and emo sobs, im sure it will bring up some feelings to most pple.. i've felt mine did u?)

lyrics~

Time is tickin', T-time is tickin' tickin
Time is tickin', T-time is tickin' away!

Nobody knows about the tears that start pouring down your cheeks, pouring without reason,
or about the broken glass raging a storm in your heart..

Because your wound turned into a sickness, your doors into walls,
And your image in the mirror has become the enemy, you're hurt, right?

Everybody turned a blind eye and left you, left you to suffocate,
Making you choose your end (they're so bad aren't they?). You've lost your purpose to live.

With no road back you'd just wander forever
And your breath would give up before your hope.

Wounds (when you cry), scars (though you try)
and tears (say goodbye) pouring out (the time is ticking).

Having wandered through death (I'll save you)

You are the one!

CHORUS
*When I'm walking through darkness-
(When you're captured in the darkness so is my breath.)
You are my savior!
You, who gave me your hand-
(When the world's doors close on you I'll offer you my hand.)*
You are the one! My savior.

Time is tickin', T-

Your hands that set the world on fire, were the blindfolds over their eyes
That star shining in your eye is "suffering" and it is your city.

Are you still sleeping on your dreams? Counting your remaining breaths? Measuring the depth of your tears?
Is your hope a sinking paper boat? You're sad, right?

Do you wake up drenched in sweat? Is your conscience groveling on the ground twitching?
Do you think this is the end? It's ok. Cuz I understand.

I'm a scar on your broken body, I'll even wipe away the tears hidden in your shattered soul.
I'll clasp your hand in mine and believe in you.

Wounds (when you cry), scars (though you try)
and tears (say goodbye) pouring out (the time is ticking).
Having wandered through death (I'll save you)
You are the one!

*Chorus*
You are the one! My savior.

Are you hurt? Are you scarred? Are you stumbling in the dark?
Are you hurt? (Faith) Are you scarred? (Destiny) Are you stumbling in the dark? (Love)

You're still beautiful to me!
You are the one!

*Chorus*

Time is tickin', T-time is tickin' tickin'
Time is tickin', T-time is tickin' away!
My savior!
One!

- i hate cold blooded girls *
2:18 PM

I miss and admire the days when i was still in my early teenage life.. everything wasnt so complicated though i start my emo-ness back in sec sch.. which then caused alot of unhappiness too..

but look where am i now?.. everyday im in deep thoughts for which i dont even know for what reasons.. just seems like these chain reactions wouldnt stop..

its time to stop walking, stay still and look at what i really want..

Go for the Goal..

Fortunate are the persons,
Who in this life can find
A purpose that can fill their days,
And goals to fill their minds!

The world is filled with many people,
Content with where they are;
Not knowing joys success can bring,
No will to go that far,

Yet in this world there is a need
For people to lead the rest,
To rise above the "average" life,
By giving off their best!

Would you be the one who dares to try
When challenged by the task?
To rise to heights you've never seen,
Or is that too much to ask?

This is your day - a world to win,
Great purpose to achieve
Accept the challenge of your goals
And in yourself believe!

- i hate cold blooded girls *
11:32 PM

faints.. tried to find a new blog skin but didnt manage to find one thats suits.. guess i'll continue nxt time.. aniway at least i fixed the display picture...

- i hate cold blooded girls *
9:55 PM

just got home.. finally.. after a hell of a week.. sighs.. i have never been so totally tired out..

i left the camp with a heavy mind and legs all the way till i reach my gate.. when i open the gate i felt a sense of relief.. thinking yay i finally can rest.. took off my boots.. went to the kitchen and saw my mum all alone at home.. probably ate alone too since theres no one else.. i saw my favourite dish "bbq chicken" and there was one left in the plate.. i feel like eating but my appetitide has long left me after another day of being fucked.. i feel sad that i cant enjoy the food my mum cook all the time becos of all the shit i get.. sighs... it probably taste bitter due to all the sweat and tears i've swallowed...

i felt heart pain and i do pity her.. whenever i wana say nice stuff appreciate her etc.. she turn me off by yelling and nagging at me... so it became a habit that no one will say nice stuffs in the family anymore.. but we do still feel for each other in our hearts..

haiz.. aniway she nagged me about my room.. i went to my room and wow ya she really did a whole lot of cleanning for me.. i do appreciate it alot.. either way i was planning to do it when i book out.. haiz.. i feel sad when she started nagging and stuff.. u know wat u hope for when u get home after a fuck up day?.. a good hug and words of concern.. but yea thats kinda impossible for chinese culture.. cos they're not that open minded.. sighs when she was nagging and stuff i felt so disappointed as always.. cos whenever i need some concern i know my family will never be the one whom will show.. and thats why my family has never been really warmth and nice.. to us its probably just a place for shelter and food.. other then that everyone basically live their own ways.. though im sure in everyone hearts we do think and care.. but wats the point when they dont show it.. or they show it in a way which is hard to accept..

sighs... now to talk abt wat happen in camp..

it sucked badly eversince last monday.. whereby LAB inspection started..

- night out on wed was great with darling

- friday night

- today kana fuck again

- bmt shit on yst

- i hate cold blooded girls *
8:40 PM