well.. finally..

its the weekend again.. but in a blink of an eye.. its gone soon.. in about 4hrs time i will be back in my bunk.. doing area cleaning as theres going to be inspection on monday.. haiz.. the S.C bunk is so freaking dirty.. makes me wonder how are we going to clean.. but even so theres no excuse for us not to do..

about saturday.. i gave darling a little surprise.. though its just a simple and small one.. i hope i really did surprised her.. i went to her hse and its really nice to see her face and feel her warmth against my chest again.. silly darling was preparing to cook lunch for herself at that point but she stop to watch naruto together with me on her pc... *silly darling actually downloaded naruto for me to watch.. so sweet of her.. thanks baby..*

after sometime.. we went out to eat something we both liked and took a walk around but sadly didnt manage to get anything.. we went back earlier to rest as i got gestric flu then we went out again at 7+pm for the night events..

thanks darling for planning saturday night events as our belated anniv celebration.. i really really appreciate it alot.. though i was quite disappointed that i didnt get to bring u go ecp for cycling and have our ice cream due to time limits.. hais... nvm i'll make sure the next round i'll be able to bring u..

it brought back alot memories to have our dinner at the same restaurant where we celebrated our first anniversary.. thanks darling.. it was sweet of u.. but sadly we were both disappointed with the change of taste in the dishes.. looks like they have changed new cooking chief..

but having dinner with darling im already very happy ler.. but at the same time very sad.. cause i know time wouldnt stop...

we left shortly after dinner so we have time to walk around.. we went to marina and walked around.. it was very loving and sweet.. hugging baby and holding her as we walked from point to point.. it felt so nice but at the same time it hurts inside of me.. becos i know soon all these will end with a good bye and i have to endure again till i can see baby.. sobs..

went to the arcade and baby as usual was so good with the games lol.. so proud of her.. after that we went to watch doomsday at 11+pm.. and end at around 1:30am.. sighs.. its the end of saturday then.. went to baby house grab all my bags and things before we both went back to my hse.. sighs.. we slept at around 4+am if i remembered correctly..

sighs.. then in the morning.. we hugged again.. before i have to say goodbye to darling as she got to reach work place by 1pm.. its always so painful to say goodbye.. the kind of feeling like ur lungs and heart have been squeezed... sobs..

sighs.. now its 6:08pm ler.. as im finishing this entry.. sighs im missing baby so much..... next week wont be a very good week for me... i hope i can endure through all the mental torture again... its so unbearable at times..

sobs.. i miss you darling! please takecare of yourself my love!
love you always! hugs!

- i hate cold blooded girls *
5:38 PM

well.. finally.. i can sit down and write alittle..

theres so much thoughts going on.. and everything is sad ones.. even now i dont know how i can say everything out.. becos theres just too much too much...

sighs.. talking abt NS life.. its totally messed up now.. all becos i didnt care abt wat im doing.. but just looking out for each book out to be with darling again.. now i made another grave mistake.. giving myself even more stress and tension to cope with..

coping with love sick is seriously hard enough.. now i have to cope with so much other issues.. im really going mad.... sighs...

真的好累好累。。 我的心好痛。。 想到我要忍受两年的折磨。。 我就真的好想放弃。。但我又不能。。 这种痛苦是说不出来的。。 我真的快疯掉了！！

sighs i really duno wat else to type already.. it just sucks..

listen to this sad song..




i miss u day and night my love.. nothing can change/stop this fact.. theres nothing in this world that can ease the pain except the silly smile, sweetness, love and everything of yours.. your my only cure darling.. but sadly theres always obsticles trying to seperate us apart....

- i hate cold blooded girls *
4:17 PM